hi i am a new member finding life a bit tough

Well I don't have breast cancer, but just wanted to say hi and welcome to the site! You'll find loads of people going through the same as you and loads that aren't but we're all here to support each other in every way that we can.

Take care!

Hi Mandie,
I had breast cancer in 2000./2001 and have survived , I did have hypnosis at one stage as I felt like you did, and was really stressing out, it helped as did counselling, I did not have this site to help me then, you will find loads of people on here that will come to your aid chat to you and help you through, glad you found the site, and anytime you want to sound off , this is the place to do it.
Best Wishes
Steffy

Hi Mandie,
i dont have breast cancer
but cervical and i could not have come this far emotionaly without this site and its a fantastic large family off strong and loving people
if you ever want to chat just pm me okay hun

take care
lv
lell
xx

Well I don't have BC either - but there are lots of people on the site who do - they must all have gone to bed early last night! I'm sure you will have loads of replies today, but in the meantime, welcome to the site. Even if we have different cancers, I think we all understand what each other is going through and support one another in every way possible. Big hugs and look forward to talking to you later on. Very best wishes, Kate xxx

Hi Mandie

Firstly welcome to the site, you have definitely come to the right place for help and support through this difficult time. I think what you are feeling is quite natural, after the shock of diagnosis and the trauma of treatment, you are bound to feel a little lost ... And most people find it gets to the point where they feel uncomfortable talking "it" over constantly with friends and family. Which is where a site like this comes into it's own - like you, we are all people who are or have been affected by cancer.

I was diagnosed with BC last April, had surgery, chemo, radiotherapy and am only just approaching the end of my 18 cycles of Herceptin. Being touched by cancer impacts your life in many ways, not just physically, and although at the time it may be hard to see, there are always some positives which can help you through what can be a time of intense emotional trauma.

Hope to see you soon in the chatroom!

Hiya, hope you're ok... I only signed up to this site yesterday, and I think it's the best networking site I've ever come across(i'm one of those who gets easily sucked into facebook/myspace etc!)

I'd also never bothered with blogs before before, but found that really helps in getting it off your chest.

Honestly, even in my short experience(am still awaiting MRI scan and first biopsy results - cervical), the people here are wonderfully supportive and positive, and willing to share their experience with you.

I think we're all being stronger and braver for the oustside world, so as not to worry our loved ones too much. But on here, we have room to let it all out.

Like I said, you are really on the right site... Although the reasons we're all on here suck, welcome to the community!

Best wishes and loads of love
xSim

Hi Mandie,

Sorry to hear you're having a rough time at the mo. I've just been in this club since April and am currently in the middle of chemo, but I do wonder how and if my life is going to change post chemo and rt. I was used to being ultra busy pre diagnosis and the thought of returning to that hell is daunting.

Keep in touch,

Best wishes,

Shelagh

i am just a year past being diagnosed with bc too, all i can say is firstly hello and welcome to here, we are very supportive and help where we can x now the normal bit returning, well, the way i see it is, yes i am still me, but my whole way of thinking has changed completely, and its so hard to cope with this new normal, i don't think we truly understand the tremendous impact that cancer has on our lives, i don't think we grieve enough for our loss, mostly i feel that we are expected to accept the unacceptable, for me thats one thing that i don't think i will ever do. hope you can understand what i mean, i confuse myself at times!!!!
Alisonxxx

hi mandy, so sorry to hear what you are going through, i wa diagnosed with bc just 2 weeks ago, i know how difficult it is to talk to, even to those we are close to, people are very kind and want to make you feel better, but unless they have been through this trauma there is no way of explaining how mind bending this news can be,
at the same time we dont want to appear to sound too much like moaners, so this is a wonderfull site to let off a bit of steam and to share your concerns with all of the kind and understanding people who know exactly how you are feeling.

wishing you all the very best of everything.

sheels

Hi I have breast cancer too , diagnosed in April and on chemo number 5 yesterday of 8 prior to surgery - its a bitch isnt it? We allknow what you are going through, but here we can rant and shout and get it all out with help along the way.

Good luck love, we are all here for you xxx

Hi Mandie
I was diagnosed in March with BC, underwent surgery 8 weeks ago and had 1 chemo session last week. Throughout it all I have tried very hard to remain positive ( dont we all)but there are times when everything becomes too much. Thats when the support and friendship of our online friends becomes very important. If you ever need a natter please feel free to PM me.Take care love Jules x

i just want to say hi, i have just been diagnosed with bile duct/liver cancer and my mind is all over the place at the moment, just hang on in there and i am sure friends will pull it round for you

....and to say your note touched a chord. I was diagnosed on Christmas Eve (so that was more boo hoo hoo than Ho Ho Ho when I hit Sainsbury's after being told)and even just 8 months later I am a different me!!

I am a lawyer and have been off work since January and the thought of going back to my stressful job terrifies me...like Sheelagh sort of echoes....I just go into meltdown if I think about it too much so stick my head in the sand and just get myself up to hospital for my daily rt. Like you...I am still me and thank God for my sense of humour (if ever we needed it!)

Not sure you can ever be the same after what we have gone thro.

Anyway I seem to be waffling......so "Hi"

Diane x

hi everyone
thank you soooo much to all for your replys....had a cry and then pulled myself together!!
im so glad to know that this is normall!!
its a year today exactly since i was told i had cancer and its been a rollercoaster of a day!!
well 1 year on im fatter(havnt been able to ride my horse as i used to) with a little less hair(whats coming back is sooo grey!!)but i still have my sense of humour(although some days i have to dig deep to find it!!) but hey im hear, im feeling pretty good and i know it could be a lot worse.
thanks again its great to know you all care
love mandie xxx

hi marsha
thanks for you mail...great to know people care
i think people on this site are gonna turn out to be pretty special
best wishes
mandie

Hi Mandie

After your good wishes to me I had a look at your profile and read your thread, you have had it tough, particularly when looking at your family history.

I really, really hope that you find the support you need from the fantastic people on here. I know I have, I was a bit complacent about the cancer returning - I'd been clear for almost 4 years and was very shocked when I was diagnosed with bone secondary. My lovely husband found this forum and I'm soooooo glad, I've made many friends and got a whole new network of people who support me and who I can reciprocate the support to. I can honestly say that WN has had a huge impact on my life (in more ways than one!)

I hope you get through all the scans, smears etc. with no problems and like your good wishes to me I send them back to you a thousandfold!

Take care
Love Carole
xxxxx

HI CAROLE
THANKS FOR YOUR LOVELY MAIL XXXX
I READ YOU PROFILE BEFORE ON ANOTHER THREAD AND I THINK YOU HAVE HAD A REALLY REALLY TOUGH TIME !!!
I AM SO SORRY THAT AFTER 4 YEARS ITS BACK,I CANT IMAGINE HOW YOU MUST HAVE FELT TO GET SOOO FAR ON AND THAT TO HAPPEN.
SADLY 33 YEARS AGO MY MUM HAD SUCH A SHORT TIME TO FIGHT THIS ILLNESS..LESS THAN 18 MONTHS AND WITH 3 CHILDREN UNDER 7 YEARS OLD I CANT IMAGINE HOW SHE FELT EITHER.
IT SOUND AS IF YOU HAVE A GREAT FAMILY AND I AM SURE THEY WILL CONTINE TO BE A GREAT SUPPORT TO YOU.
HOW ARE YOU FEELING NOW? AND IF YOU DONT MIND ME ASKING WHAT TREATMENT ARE YOU HAVING AT THE MOMENT?
I HOPE YOU ARE WELL AND LOOK FORWARD TO CHAT
TAKE CARE LOVE MANDIE

Thanks for your very kind message too Mandie.

I'm doing OK, got the results of my liver scan on Monday and its clear so I breathed a sigh of relief and started to get on with my 'normal' life!

I have bone metastasis in my arm, but its been treated (pinned due to thinness of the bone) had RT and now on a bone strengthening drug called Ibandronic Acid, along with Femara and Zoladex injection, so currently controlled. I shall have a further routine CT scan next month then probably every 3 months or so. So feeling quite good at the moment.

I think there are very many optimistic people on WN, regardless of the stage of their diagnoses. We all tend to celebrate others' good news and share the pain and grief of the not so good news.

I don't really look on myself as having had it tough, I have a lovely, supportive immediate and extended family as I'm sure most people on WN do and they all helped me cope, particularly first time round when I had a small, very poorly baby. The guilt was pretty immeasurable at first as I felt responsible for him having to be born early and go through so much at the beginning of his life. But now he's a typical 4 year old, coming out with the funniest things, driving us mad and giving us much joy ..... so to me it was all worth it and I'd go through it all again just to have him!!!

Its so tragic, your situation, growing up without your mum must have been so hard for all of you, and must make you cherish your own children more. I suppose the good thing is that treatment today is a million times better than when your poor mum was suffering. So lets keep our fingers crossed for you, hope that your treatment is successful, I'm so glad that you have found us all. One thing guaranteed you will get support on here and if you want to scream, shout at the injustice of it all ..... we'll be hear to listen!

You take care, lots of love to you and your family, please keep us informed.

Carole
xxxxxx

Hi Mandie - I feel you and wish you well xxx

Hi Mandie,
First of all welcome!!!!
I dont have BC but have NHL,coming up to 12 mths since dx 21st Dec 2007, I know exactly how your feeling, for the past 12 months Ive been on this 'Roller Coaster Ride' and feel somewhere along the way ive lost a 'part of me', and feel i need to 'find myself again'! but like Denning says 'maybe were never the same after what weve been through' which i think is so true, when i was first dx the first thing i said to my family was ''you know i will never be the same person i was'' needless to say they looked at me like i had lost the plot!! and they obviously didnt believe me, but they sure do now!!!!! Thank god like you and so many people, ive kept my sense of humour, dont know what id have done without it, its seen me through quite a lot of situations, and i certainly intend to keep hold of it.
Like Marsha says we are all here to help and support each other, ive found a lot of help and support here and know that you will too.
So hang in there and heres to finding 'Our Slightly New Selves'

Take care
Sue xxx

I was first diagnosed with breast cancer nearly 14 years ago and have been living with secondaries for the past 4 years and I agree with you that it is a rollercoaster ride and one that I'm still on but still enjoy life even though things are a bit difficult at the moment.

I'm not sure whether it will help you but I created a website for our support group (with the help of a grant from Macmillan) a couple of years ago and I've put an article on there from Dr Peter Harvey who was a Consultant Psychologist (now retired from Leeds) about 'after treatment - what next?' and about the rollercoaster ride. If you're interested in reading it go to www.pbcsg.co.uk (peterborough breast cancer support group - pbcsg) and look under 'after treatment' and you'll find it.