my mum has womb cancer

Firstly I want to say that I'm sorry about what's happening to your Mum. It is obviously turning your world upside down, and you must be very worried. Can I ask if your Mum has been put in touch with a Cancer MacMillan Nurse yet? They are very good for helping to explain what is going on if the doctor is too busy or not very communicative, and they will also offer emotional support, both to your Mum but also to you. It's often really good to talk to someone who is not actually a member of the family as you can say what is on your mind. Sorry to hear there are complications, but I hope that the chemo can start soon. Has your Mum been told what sort of chemo drug or drugs (sometimes they give a combination) she will be having, so that you can research the side-effects by asking people on this site for their experiences. How had your Mum coped with what is a big operation? Finally I want to say welcome to What Now. I am so glad that it has already given you some comfort - we all feel like that, that at least we are not alone, and I hope that contact wth people here will give you emotional support, as well as answers. Don't forget to check out the Chat Room, as there are some very friendly and kind people - and some who might even make you laugh despite everything - on the site. With very best wishes xxxx Penny

Hi Penny
I heard that we will be assigned a macmillan nurse just hasn't happened yet - but i will look into it.
My mum had her op about 3/4 weeks ago + was recovering perhaps too well until she developed some kind of stomach problem. Fortunately (i think) i just got news that they have found an infection in the lining of her stomach - she has been back in hospital for a week & nobody seemed to know what was wrong apart from she was bleeding in her stomach + sickness & diahhrea (never been able to spell that!)But they put a camera in her stomach today & thats what they found - so i am relieved they know what to treat now.
She will have 2 types of chemo drugs - i can't remmeber their names - i will check so can find out a bit more. She will lose her hair so we were thinking to set a little project for her friends in her craft club!

Unfortunately I live in Greece + my mum is in UK so am feeling more than uselessabout the situation sometimes!!!!I was there few weeks ago + will go again soon - just not sure if quiting my job to go there for longer is the best thing for her - or is it just for myself!??
sorry im rambling now!!!!

thanks for your thoughts
Marie x

Thanks for posting a reply. It is good news that they have located and identified the problem with your Mum's digestive system (ha! avoided having to spell THAT tricky word!). I am sorry that your Mum will suffer hair loss, but there are quite a few threads on here with advice on coping with that - and certainly if she has some friends who are good at making little caps, I'm sure she would appreciate that. Is it possible for someone else in the family to chase up the Cancer MacMillan nurse being assigned, as sometimes if you do not chase things, they fall by the wayside, and it really does help to have someone professional to talk to, and to listen! Do other family members live nearby your Mum, as she may find that it is hard to cope alone once she is on chemo. Of course it all depends upon the drugs, and upon individual resistence, but it could be that she needs help shopping, cleaning and cooking, and with getting to appointments. Would she tell you honestly, do you think, if she would want you home, or would she try to cope? If there is other help available, she may feel worse if you give up your life there, or she may very much appreciate some tlc from her daughter. It's a very hard situation, and we have had several long-distance illnesses on What Now before. Please keep us posted of any developments, and, in the meantime, hugs to you and your Mum, and let's hope the infection gets dealt with. xxxx Penny

Hi Penny
I think my mum would be the last person to ask for help - luckily
my Aunt who lives nearby has invited her to stay with her - so that is good news - although reluctant to leave her own little house & her independance she finally agreed it's probably a good idea for now.
The tummy trouble turned out to be e coli & gastritus - not pleasant - but at least they are being treated now. She has an appointment with the chemo doctor today although probably won't start treatment until she's fully ove these tummy blips.
My mum does have two sisters & one brother who live close by, as well as a few more scattered around the world - so lots of people egging her on - but we are not all there on a daily basis. My sister lives in London (mum is up in the north west) so she visits when she can. As for me - for now I will go at the end of the month for 2/3 weeks & i will play it by ear i think - & certainly look into ways of spending more time there over the next few months!!
I did have a little moment of realization the other day - i realized that for the past month - whenever i have talked to my mum we have mainly talked about her cancer, doctors , ailments etc & i tried to make a conscious effort to also talk about what we usually talk about - although mum obviously has a smaller helping of gossip than usual with not being out & about so much - perhaps other people have found that too? don't want to think of mum as just mum who's sick!
Marie xx

I remember when I was first diagnosed, it just swallows everything else in your life, and at first you need everyone to admit that it is momentous and talk about it, or all things medical. However once I started the treatment, it was lovely to hear from people what else was happening, and to listen to tales of normality. I think a balance between the two is good, as if someone JUST talks about lovely "normal" things like weddings and parties and exciting things, the patient feels cast out on some desert island. The ideal is to ask how they feel, first, and then convey other news. Humour and having a good laugh are especially appreciated.
It sounds as though your Mum will be looked after well, and it is ideal to have someone full time present just in case. Hope the tummy bug clears up and the treatment can start soon. Lots of love xxx Penny