Penile (Penis) Reconstruction

Should I or should I not laugh ?

Sorry but yep I did ;0)

So glad that you and your husband can have that sense of humour - a must methinks ;0)

All the best and please let us know how you both get on

Lesley xxx

hi JG,

just love the humour, can imagine your husband in shock with having to wax his bits, why not get him to do a brazillian then he might have an idea what we girls go through. lol, hope your both keeping up your spirits up, gin or whisky are good me thinks,

best wishes and good luck, to you both, will follow you on this sight, so keep us laughing, it's the only way to deal with the big crock of sh** god throws at us.

ps., is it going to be made bigger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

good luck, Dorne xx

Hi,

Thanks all. It is good to be able to laugh about it.There was a time when we were not laughing so much www.cancernursing.org/forums/topic.asp?TopicID=58 but we have come out the other side now. My husband groans when I share our humour because it so ...crude. He is a shy guy really. He does not like Shania Twain's "Man..I Feel Like a Woman" for some reason.!!

Best Wishes all

JG

Hi JG,

you still not answered my question is he going to be made bigger, is that his secret wish and yours for that matter, come on give us a laugh, shed some light and stop us all thinking what he will end up with, a tiddler or a stonker??????? all meant in good humour, hope no one is offened but I've got a wicked sense of humour, sorry,

best wishes to you both and am thinking of you, Dorne xx

HI Dorne,

Sorry missed that bit.

Let's just say ...Linford Christie eat your heart out. Looking for a nice pair of lyrca shorts.

Best Wishes

JG

if only you could put those wee funny icon faces on here!

Mine is a picture !!!

he he he he

When we went to London to see the guy doing the op, he showed us a load of pics of other ops he had done. Then clicked on specific ones to show "in detail" the results of his labour.

Imagine being the only woman sitting in a room with three other guys and looking at an array of penis's. I tried really hard to look straight at the screen.

Les - the icon I would have is a burning red face. eeck !!!

When it is done ...i've got to tell my husband how wonderful it looks.

(To my hubbie-hello darling !!!! of course it will look wonderful)

Best wishes

JG

Hi all,

Well...we are off to London tomorrow for my husband's pre-assessment. I don't know why ..but I am quite nervous about this. I think I am worried about the fact that my husband has asthma and high blood pressure and whether these problems will affect the surgeons descision about whether he his a suitable candidate for the op?

My husband is getting jittery about the up and coming op also. He is concerned about the scars that he will be left with on his arm and derriere (his but). They are taking some skin off his bottom to graft onto his arm where they are taking skin etc from to make penis. All very complicated if you ask me. Makes you wander why they can't just take it off his bum in the first place. I am sure the surgeon explained this...something to do with tissue type and less hair growth on his arm. He likes to play cricket...but of course while the footballers bath together ...the cricketers use communal showers.

He is going to have dressings galore. Our son was really upset last time at the sight of his dressing. He only saw the one on his thigh where they took the skin from to graft onto his glansectomy. My husband was wearing shorts as they were more comfortable and easier to get on. He had to start wearing trousers/jogpants.

Best wishes to everyone

JG

Hi all,

Just a quick note as got lots of stuff to get together. We are going to London on thursday, hubbie having op on Friday. All went well at the pre assessment. just a minor wee infection treated with some antibiotics. We made a day of it in London and had a great time. Weather was fantastic.

We took the littleuns to Wales at the weekend. Saturday was a difficult day. we were all arguing , everyone was tetchy. I ended up crying in the bathroom at the end of the night when after speaking to my husband, we realised that the children were really scared about the up coming op. We all cuddled and chatted the next day and had better time next two days. Again weather was great.

The children are going to be left at home with my mum looking after them, while I go down to London with my hubbie. My mum is totally cool, she will keep their spirits up, no problem...no worries there.

Take care everyone. Have fun in the chatroom.

JG

Just some hugs for the days ahead.

Take care

xxxxx

Thanks les.

take care yourself.

JG XXX

Hi all,

Thanks for your messages, I read them last night and It was a fantastic boost, to think you all were behind us and thinking of us.

My hubbie went down to theatre at 8am and got to ITU at 19:45 hrs. He said he was in recovery around 6pm but he was in so much pain they kept him there until they had it under control. He had a PCA...a pump that he could press the button, to give him the painkiller... for his pain until the Monday. Then the pain control team came round and discussed with us both...which I really appreciated....about what pain killers he would need after coming off the pump. I was concerned that he would be left to having to ask for them and then be a MAN about it and wait until he was in agony before asking. But they listened to my concerns and put him on regular painkillers. Such a relief!!! he was in so much pain after his previous op.

All the staff at the hospital(University College Hospital, London) were really friendly, helpful and attentive. And I mean everyone, from the people in the reception, the porters, the security people and the nurses, drs and cleaning staff. It was a brilliant experience. It was a therapy...It has helped to heal some of the wounds made at the previous hospital...which will remain nameless.

He has got a lot of wounds to take care of. He has got the "NEW MAN" with lot of stitches around that and up his abdomen where they had to connect the blood supply. He has got the arm where they took the skin from for the "New Man" and he has got the buttocks wounds. These surprised both of us. We knew they were taking skin from the buttocks to graft onto the arm, but we did not realise they were going to take it from both buttocks. They have taken it from the bottom part of both..full thickness skin... and then pulled the two edges together. Which has given him a CHESHIRE CAT GRIN suture line on his bottom!!! He has had a bum tuck in the process...I like A nice tight BUT!!!

The five hour journey in the car from London was not much fun for my hubbie sitting on his sore bum all the way. But fortunately we have a very comfortable settee and chairs at home. Other than trying to sit on his bum the "New Man" is not causing him any pain. The main pain he is getting is in his arm where they took the skin from. That is a sight...though not as bad as we were expecting. It is very neat. But at the moment it is swollen around the graft site, which makes it look worse. As that settles down hopefully it will look better....My Hubbie is planning to where long sleeves. Our son was shocked at the sight of the arm, with all the dresssings on...and it has sparked a lot of questions...which my hubbie is answering. He is settling down now but he is afraid to go near his dad. He came straight for me when we came through the door and gave me a massive cuddle but did not want to go to his dad. He gave him a cuddle this morning though.

The District Nurses came today...While the FA Cup final was on...but fortunately they did not have to stay long as I had done all the dressings after his shower that needed doing. They just came in for a look and left a few more things for us.

So now it is just lots of followups in London and another couple of ops. AND LOTS OF SLEEP ALL ROUND!!!

Love To All

JG XXXX

Just found out...hubbie missed the one and only goal scored in the match when the District Nurses came...not in his good books!!!! Ha Ha

JG XXX

I am so happy for you both that this operation has now been completed and was a success (well, you'll not had time to try it yet fully yet awhile one presumes...) . I am amazed by what surgeons can do! How lovely that you were treated so well throughout your stay at the hospital in London - it really makes all the difference, doesn't it? Well, we're glad you're back home safely, and wish you all the best for a full recovery (I'll keep the bad jokes to a minimum as you've warned that the gentleman himself is amongst us!). Lots of love xxx Penny

So pleased to see it has gone well!

I also have a terrible mind, so I'll hide behind Penny when the jokes surface!

Good to hear about the butt lift though, I think most men could do with one of them! ;-)

Yep, I try not to look in mirror too much myself! xxxx

Hi all,

Can't say much... talking total gibberish. Totally tired.

I have cut and paste this message to a few people so if you already read this sorry.

After helping hubby with a shower at 10am approx, I took out sutures in his bottom and dressed his "area" and then got him dressed so that he could go downstairs. Then district nurse came. And we started to take out the sutures in his arm. We had to take it in turns there were so many. Only after a short while she confessed that she was not feeling well and had to go. They could not get any one else to come out today to help me so I had to carry on by myself. She did suggest leaving it until tomorrow...I said I would carry on until I was too tired. I finished it. It took two hours. finished everything just in time for in-laws bringing children home from school at 15:45hrs. Totally ache.

JG

i think you really need to look after yourself as well JG, if things can be left till the next day leave them x no good knackering yourself out x anyway, how is hubby feeling in his self? think you could both do with a holiday once everything has settled back down again xxx
lots of love
Alisonxxxxxxxx

Thanks Alison,

Hubby wants to get married (again) and have another honeymoon...when everything in place!!!....then said forget getting married just go for the honey moon.

I know ...fool to myself...I was being stubborn and continuing. But seriously...one of the things the nurse specialist specified was not exposing the wound too often to reduce possible infection.

Love to all,

coming round a bit now

JG XXX

Hi JG and hubby
I'm glad all seems to be going well and wish you and hubby all the best for the future.
Reading this has made my eyes water, 1- because of your humour and 2- because I'm a bloke.
Keep it up (so to speak)

Paul and family xxx

hi paul of many names,

It's amazing how many people have told my husband to "keep his pecker up" over the last year. Makes him smile every time.

we're both recovering a bit now. Got to go to London on Thursday. He is having an "x-ray" to see if it has healed up -the urethra- wee tube. If it has he can pee like a man and have the supra pubic catheter out.

You would not believe the horrors that he has gone through going to the toilet when we have gone out over the last year. He has had to use the cubicles in the male toilets. They have ben terrible...no toilet seat, no light, toilet door does not lock, the list goes on. It will be a relief for him to go to the toilet like a man again.

Our lad is asking why he has to keep going in the cubicles. don't know yet if hubby is going to feel brave enough to use urinals. Probably not until had his op to shape the head of the penis to look like a circumcised glans.

Oh...yes...just remembered...he is having the stitches taken out of the penis on thursday by the nurse specialist. Hubby wants to ask for morphine !!! I said can I have some too. Not going to be fun.

EEECCCKK

Love to all

JG

Both of you have gone through agony, but you manage to make the rest of us laugh along with the squirming and the "Yikes!". Yes, it's odd what peripheral observations on society come up on What Now. I'd never realised Gents' prob only have one proper cubicle. Is it possible for your husband to get one of the private keys and use the special Lavatories that are locked up and only genuinely disabled people can use? Have forgotten what this system is called. These seem to be cleaner as well, as you do not get the vandalism or misuse. I know there are not many of them about, though.

Good luck with the inspection, and with the removal of those stitches! xxx Penny

HI all...

Yep...unfortunately ... it has not completely healed up...there is a small hole where the new bit of urethra meets the old...so hence a leak... This means that he can't have the supra pubic catheter out just yet and he can't pee like a man... Don't know exatcly what is going to happen yet...possibly go back down in couple of weeks for another "x-ray" or fluoroscopy as I have now found out. Did not think they could just do "x-ray" as there ain't no bone in it!!! So We are "Going with the Flow".

Hubby had stitches out of penis ...Wow.. there was a lot of them... we did ask for morphine....lol.. but the nurse specialist was very adept at it and did it really quickly without causing any pain..!! Phew!!!

love to all

JG XXX

Poor hubby! Having to stay with the catheter must be a big disappointment, also the worry of where the puncture is! Fantastic though that the stitches are out - and painlessly: I found all my nurses were brill, very kind and very considerate, although a little bit of liquid morphia did help along with the removal of about 200 metres (felt like it) of wadding along with the Internal Radiotherapy tubes. As usual you two have marvellous sense of humour coping with al this horror. Good luck xxxx Penny

You'll both get there in the end J. Just a shame you have to travel back to London (Thats the least of your problems I suppose)
Best wishes xx

hi jg your wonderful comments are inspiring to us all. to be able to laugh is a great gift and in such a situation i can only applaud you. i would just like to ask a personal question if i may. i may lose my vagina to cancer surgery and worried sick that my partner will not be able to cope without full sex and wondered how you find you are coping. i know that if the situation were reversed it would not change how i feel about him and there are always other ways to be intimate but your comments would help me enormously to face what i may have to have done. my love and best wishes to you both and hope all goes well as you both deserve it to work as you sound such great people. i hope you understand why i am contatting you. many thanks tina.

JG has sent me quick message to say that she is staying nearby the hospital where her hubby has been taken. He is to have a scan tomorrow and it sounds as though they are quite concerned about what is going on inside. She is also suffering from being separated from the children, as her Mum has taken them for a week's hol whilst all this goes on. JG did manage to take her hubby out of hospital today for a short escape from hospital life and routine.

As she is staying with relatives, it is not possible for her to be on the computer much, but I'm sure she would appreciate it if we write on here, or the new topic I am about to start, or send private message of em/sympathy for her and her hubby. We all know the stress of waiting for scan results! We all wish them the very very best of luck. xxx Penny

hi all,

TINAD, I would just like to appologise for not replying to you on here sooner but the last few weeks have been a bit frantic. I have sent you a Private Message with my thoughts...Hope it helps. And I would like to say thankyou to everyone for all their support.

My hubby was taken down to London (10th June)because his wounds were starting to "not look as good". It started with an area on one cheek of his buttock. It looked red and as if it was going to burst. Then it was his new penis and there was a swelling in lower abodomen which turned out to be a collection of pus. Basically, after wonderful care and treatment at the hospital in London, this has all resolved. He was let out last Saturday... (in time for us to be able to go to the Rave) and we had to go back down on Wednesday for it to be checked out. Everything going well, so they decided to see if the supra pubic catheter could come out. They clamped it of first and he had to wee with his new penis. everything went well...there were no problems so they took the catheter out yesterday and he has been "sinking battleships" ever since. He says he feels "LIKE a MAN!!!" . It's brilliant.

Love and best wishes to everyone...and again...THANKS from all of us...

JG TLS and family XXXXXXX

It's good to hear that things have gone so well for you, JG and hubby, and I feel like doing a small dance to celebrate. In fact, I think I will. After so much trouble and anxiety it's a relief that your husband feels himself again and that you're all at home together. It's also good to hear that the doctors have done such a good job.

Pat (dancing)

what a lot you have both been through, but fight it you have and you both have such wonderful smiles xxxxxxxxxxx i can still see you both on that bench in euston, eating pasties and having a drink and laughing and joking, how good that we can laugh in the face of such devastation in our lives, and to know that we are not alone is such a comfort i feel. lots of love as ever, to you both and your wonderful beautiful children
Alisonxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I am so happy for you both - and of course for the children. It is so so lovely to hear some really good news about such lovely people. Three cheers for the hospital staff who were obviously meticulous and professional. xxx Penny

So happy for you both , it is so good to hear that things have been successful.
Congratulations , and a big hug for your lovely children.
Steffy & Tomdog