How are you feeling?

Sue 2

One of the most common feelings people have when they’re living with cancer is a sense of loneliness - the feeling that they have to deal with it on their own. This might seem strange when you consider that cancer is relatively common – after all, one in three of us will develop it at some point in our lives. I remember when I used to work in a cancer outpatient’s department  - people coming for the first time would always be surprised at how busy it was. And they would realise that it wasn't just them dealing with cancer and its treatment.

Regardless of how busy a clinic might be, there can still be a sense of isolation. It can affect people at different times in their illness. And it's not just the person with the illness who might feel isolated - family and friends can feel lonely and isolated too.

Even if you’re surrounded by family and friends, you can still feel on your own. You may feel that no one really understands what you’re going through. We're all different in how we cope with challenges like serious illness. Some people want to fight and not let cancer ‘take them over’, while others are happy to let the doctors take control.

Often the sense of isolation is made worse if you find it difficult to talk about how you feel and what you are going through. It can be hard to talk to friends and family about how you feel; you tell them that you’re fine, when really, you feel very different inside.

There's no 'right' person to talk to. Neither is there the 'right' thing to say. What's important is that you talk to someone you trust and are comfortable with. Talking often helps - it can bring people closer, it can help put things in perspective - and it can help you to feel not so alone.  

And of course, if you don't want to talk to somone face to face, you can talk on the phone, text on your mobile, and use social network sites on the internet. There are so many ways we can communicate now - and these can all help people to feel less isolated. 

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